Fat Bastard Quiz

Print and circle your response for each question.

1) After a round of golf you like to

a) have a cold refreshing beer

b) have a short nap

c) have a second round of golf

d) have a cold refreshing beer, a short nap, and a second round of golf

2) When possible, you like to golf

a) twice a season

b) twice a month

c) twice a week

d) twice a day

3) Your playing partner is about to take his third stroke from a greenside bunker; you

a) politely offer him advice on how to correct his stance

b) mentally keep track of his strokes in case he miss-counts

c) mentally keep track of his strokes in case he tries to cheat

d) laugh

4) During a round of golf you like to

a) walk and carry your clubs to get some exercise

b) walk and use a pull-cart so you don't strain your back

c) drive a cart so you have enough energy to play a second round

d) drive a cart so you have a place to put your drink

5) The forecast is for an extremely hot, humid day; you

a) decide not to golf that day

b) book an early tee-time to avoid the peak heat

c) book whatever tee-time you can get to still get a round in

d) book an early tee-time so can still get in a second round

6) During a round of golf you like to

a) enjoy the scenic beauty of the great outdoors

b) enjoy the friendly competition inherent to the game

c) enjoy the camaraderie of your playing partners

d) enjoy the scenic beauty of the beer cart girl

7) You've whiffed your tee-shot and the ball is sitting by the tee when the cart-girl arrives; you

a) re-tee your ball and take a mulligan

b) calmly re-tee your ball and count a stroke

c) order a drink and wait for the cart-girl to leave before re-teeing your ball and counting a stroke

d) order a drink and drop your pants before re-teeing your ball and counting a stroke

8) When you hear the term “movie classic”, you think of

a) sentimental classics such as My Fair Lady, The Sound of Music, Terms of Endearment or Shakespeare in Love

b) “old classics” from the 30’s and 40’s such as Gone with the Wind or Casablanca

c) action-oriented classics such as Ben Hur, The French Connection, Unforgiven, Braveheart or Gladiator

d) the only classic; Caddyshack

9) Your favorite Looney-Tunes character is

a) Who are the Looney-Tunes?

b) Looney-Tunes are childish and a bad influence

c) Tweety Bird, Porky Pig, Daffy Duck, Sylvester or Elmer Fudd

d) Tasmanian Devil, Yosemite Sam, Wile E. Coyote, Marvin the Martian, Foghorn Leghorn, Bugs Bunny or the Road Runner

Score 1 point for each (a); 2 points for each (b); 4 points for each (c); and 5 points for each (d).